So last week I had to use a public toilet to change my tampon. I was already feeling cranky and annoyed. And this toilet certainly didn’t help with that. There was no toilet roll. The toilet didn’t flush. And the floor was well, let’s just say I’ve seen cleaner scrap yards.
It wasn’t clean but I had no choice. As I sat there, looked around and thought: What are the best toilets in Europe? The kind of toilets that make you feel comfortable. The kind where I can go not just to get guaranteed cleanliness, or a toilet that flushes, but a bit of class too?
I’m talking somewhere you can pamper your period. I’m talking WCs for VIPs.
1. The Shard, London
A loo with a view. Now we’re talking. London’s tallest building, and the fourth tallest in Europe, also has a sky-high toilet that you can use when visiting the viewing platform. Tickets to use the platform cost £25 so a little more cost-effective than the Four Seasons. Just don’t be one of those who takes a selfie while they use it.
2. Four Seasons George V, Paris
Now the toilets in their presidential suite are fit for a royal bum. The bathroom offers decadence to the extreme with a choice of all-marble or all-onyx décor (I’m an onyx woman myself). Good news: there are plenty of low cost flights to Paris. Bad news: It’s expensive. I won’t say exactly how much, but you can have a nice weekend in Paris for a similar price.
3. Stegastein Lookout, Aurland, Norway
Answer the call of nature and immerse yourself in it. This public toilet boasts wonderful Scandi minimalism and sits on the edge of a cliff, giving you a front seat to a majestic view of the fjords. Don’t mind if I do.
4. Transparent toilet, Lausanne, Switzerland
So this is probably not the most comfortable of experiences for everyone. But it’s cool in a sci-fi sort of way: a toilet that starts off transparent and then goes completely frosted when you lock it, thanks to nifty LCD Privacy Glass that’s activated by electricity.
5. One-way mirror toilet, London
Who needs frosted glass when you can just have a one-way mirror? Artist Monica Bonvicini created this installation, ‘Don’t Miss A Sec’, so people can creepily watch the world go by while using the loo. Actually, I bet there’s something kind of satisfying about doing that. Just me? Okay.
6. The May Fair Hotel, London
So London seems to be leading the way for posh toilets. This fella – in the ‘Ebony Suite’ of the May Fair Hotel – heats up, has an integrated bidet and can give you a massage too.
7. Gold Restaurant, Milan
Subtlety may not be Dolce & Gabanna’s strong point. Their glitzy Milan restaurant has a bathroom boasting golden walls, floors and fixtures, and in each cubicle a plasma TV playing the movie Goldfinger 24/7.